My World of Wonder/Day 26

All I want to do is run and hide! Yesterday, while getting report from the previous nurse, my biggest FEAR came true. Since moving to DAYS one of my responsibilities is to educate and teach patients about their disease process and diagnosis. Well, I had taught and educated a patient wrong and I made a mistake. The one thing I am grateful for, it didn't cost this patient their life. Thursday while working, I was discharging a patient who had multiple diagnoses one of which was CHF. "Oh, this will be easy" I thought, but come to find out it was a different story.

I discharged this patient Thursday after lunch only to have her return late Thursday night. As I cared for her on Friday, things went well, I gave report to the next nurse and I guess "all HELL broke loose!" Family members were confronting the nurse, and concerned about the care she was receiving and wondering why she wasn't told of some diagnosis--the family went onto tell this nurse about what they though CHF was and then she made it known to them that they were informed wrong. She went onto explain it in more detail.

When I came on the next morning, she told me about her night with the family and how she re-explained to the patient and some of the family about the disease process for CHF. As I sat there in report all I wanted to do was crawl back in my shell and cry. I felt soooo STUPID! "How could I have done that?!"

Later, I went in and talked with patient. I apologized and explained to her what I had done wrong. She was so understanding, but I was carrying around such a heavy burden. I also had the opportunity to talk with her sister. We had a great conversation, alot of the burden was lifted, but I still feel inadequate.

As all of this was going on I took the time to talk with the MD about what had happened. I explained to him what I had done and he then told me of the his encounter with the family and how he had spent a great deal of time on more than one occasion talking with the family about the patients diagnosis and concerns. He was so good with me and I couldn't have asked for a better MD.

In all of tears and physical pain I feel, I have been truly blessed to have a Father in Heaven who loves me and is mindful of who I am. I had a gentle reminder today about how Heavenly Father can bring peace into our hearts. I am grateful to know that I have the knowledge that things will be okay. When I go back to work on Tuesday it will be a new day filled with new adventures, stories and experiences that I can learn from and grow.